Tuesday, February 9, 2010

With lots of moving around at the office, some areas becoming more crowded, others less, the long standing conventional wisdom on which bathrooms are best for pooping in has changed dramatically.

To help with this transition period, Chris (pictured) sent out a company-wide email breaking down each of the five "pooping options."

Here's an excerpt:

"Bathroom 1 (closest to the kitchen): While sporting the best selection of reading material and general supplies (so changing the toilet paper roll is easy), this room has a particularly tiny seat. Definitely a finesse target.

"Bathroom 3: If you enjoy well-worn golf magazines, this is the spot for you. As a warning though, the sense of seclusion gained by walking all the way into the back and down the little hall is illusory. Many long-haul poopers have found themselves walking out of the john in the middle of a major meeting that started 20 minutes earlier.

"Bathroom 5 (The one with NO FAN): I’m not saying you can’t let fly here, but keep in mind that the only way your left-behinds will clear it is by slowly diffusing through the doorway, into the hallway, and out toward Ivan’s desk. This bathroom is the Worst. Possible. Choice. of all the bathrooms."

Taking a picture of Chris outside bathrooms 4 and 5 we realized that someone was actually in bathroom 5.

Chris: Is someone in there? I can hear you peeing in there. Who is it?
Whoever Was in Bathroom 5: [silence]

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