Monday, August 17, 2009


Sarah, on her way back from the dentist. Six Novocaine shots in one side of her mouth.

Sarah: I'm smiling as big as I can, but one side doesn't work. Isn't it sad? It looks like I had a stroke.
Me: From the side, your mouth sort of looks like Ray Liotta's when he laughs.

We went to CVS to fill her painkiller prescription. While she waited by the pharmacy, I went up to the front counter to get a Diet Coke. The man in front of me was maybe in his early fifties, with matching jeans and stonewashed jean jacket. "I don't know what cigars to get. I'm new to this. Let's see, what uh... what kind of cigar is best for making, you know, a blunt?"

The teenage girl behind the counter seemed taken aback for a second, then, "Uh... these?"

"Okay. Okay. Maybe I should get a flavor. I don't know. I just don't want her bitchin' at me for getting the wrong thing, you know?"

2 comments:

onbehalfof said...

hahaha. Best entry this year.

Arnie said...

I was talking to Tom at work today and he said, "Oh, I've been meaning to mention, that Tom comment about something being the best entry. That wasn't me. I mean, it was a good entry, but I don't know if it was the best. And I didn't write that."

I didn't think it was him (the "hahaha" is very not-Tom), but I don't know that many Toms. Must be a Mystery Tom.